Service Improvement?

 improvement of service?

Whenever a company of data-gangsters trying to gather more information, we are justified in saying that in this way will” improve the service “: from that moment, all the journalists open the the ins and outs and explain to the masses of stoned using that data will be better “can learn about our tastes,” and then in advertising you can offer us the very thing we seek.

The mass tends to drink this shit, but now we are at the level of hallucination. I am almost fifteen years since these data-gangsters collect data, and just yesterday the google android marketplace offered me an app to “know when my next menstrual cycle.”

I swear I was tentatissimo installing it. That is, if someone intimate do not be surprised when you arrive next cycle, and you think that you would be really Surprised O If you arrived, this app should just do miracles. At least in my case. After almost 40 years that I produce sperm, I would like really Avoid be surprised to my next menstrual cycle. I think that is quite rational.

However, it remains to be explained how Google, after collecting all the data on me, do you still think that I have the problem of the “next menstrual cycle.” Google, can you hear me? is since 1970 that I have not the cycle. And I had not even the first, (if not in the field of complex numbers).

It must have made a mistake, but mistakes here begin to be frequent. To take another example, according to my Amazon account, well I bought 8 pairs of athletic shoes (including hiking, winter and summer) in the last six anni.La thing occurs to me, so I’m sure that Amazon has memory. All shoes were the same size. And since I’ve postponed it back, it would be reasonable to speculate that that is my number.

Amazon keeps asking what size shoe I want.

Now, if there is a crawler that reads this post, I want to say once and for all: I declare officially that the Puma sports shoes, the 44.5 degree, fit me perfectly. For about a decade now. (You never know by now understand that measurement of shoes I ports. Still we hope.).

The same is true for my exercise habits. In addition to the shoes I bought four belts Judo, two pairs of pants (always judo) and two jackets from Judo “Moskito” because they are relatively specialized things, and a jacket from Judo is not equal to a Karate, I suppose you could I guess that I enjoy judo.

Amazon continues to offer me material for Tae Do Qwon.

I’m not an expert in Tae Kwon Do, but from the little that I see I doubt that there are common techniques. And I doubt that they use the same jacket. And I see the belt system is different.

The only time when Amazon guesses my taste comes AFTER every purchase. As soon as I click to buy, in fact, part of an advertisement that gives me the same thing I just bought. I do not know who planned this thing, but if I call jerk my balls feel belittled. So I will not. Have you heard? I do not call my balls because I do not offend my Zebedee. I fear for vengeance do I have the loop, here. (So ​​glad we do Google).

UPDATE of August 2, 2019: apparently after this article Amazon has noticed that I do judo.

 Service Improvement?

Now it only remains to refine the concept of “old” and the “size”. Courage. At this rate, for 2053 we will succeed.

… I could go with almost any data-gangsters of the world, but my question is simple:

But when shit get ‘sti “service enhancements”?

That is, if I was (I know) the Puma AG and noticing me that Amazon does not know which port shoes fit a customer after EIGHT TIMES buying my shoes, I would call them “pile of balls.” And I would ask what the hell “targeted advertising” is this that make me pay. Because if I’m going to be [random] data-gangster and ask him to advertise my product, and then to learn that the shoes advertising is not targeted even on (which is a given trite ), honestly I would ask what the hell that means. “targeted”

If we notassi that when I try of the Puma shoes the Amazon system offers me pretty much everything except the Puma, and so does Google, honestly I would turn a hair balls. You do pay for advertising “targeted” because “thanks to the collected data” you can know “almost everything” on the tastes of customers. And thank goodness. Otherwise they would have offered me a blender?

 Service Improvement?

supersedes that research offers me both shoes “Herren” that “Damen”. We are in chapter “plan your cycle.”

And after all these “improvements”, a customer is looking for a brand of shoes and the system proposes another. A Search Engine dyslexic . After the artificial intelligence, artificial dyslexia.

A service miglioratissimo , is not it? It was not worth collecting inhuman amounts of data to create a research system dyslexic?

Now, I can make several assumptions:


  1. I am the only human being to escape the mechanism of collecting data to improve the service. I can anonymize my movements on the internet so much that even by going with my account, receiving an SMS with a OTP, ordering to me and paying with my credit card to Amazon I remain anonymous. Hackers Kremlin, puppatemelo, here we are at Hogwarts level


  2. The service improvements are kept secret. The service has improved a lot thanks to all this data, but Amazon, Google, Facebook & co manage to keep secret all this improvement. Their love of secrecy is such that prefer to look like a stack of balls incompetent rather to show the tremendous improvements in their service.


  3. The service improvements are keen to privacy. It means that Amazon, Google, Facebook & co they impippano of your privacy, listen to you pressing the phone’s microphone, the technicians will come on Alexa and were sweeping (to pass the time when they make the night work), etc., but the improvements of services have their own privacy, so trouble if I do not see them. In short, respect the privacy of service improvement, voyeurs who are not more. Of your privacy instead it impippano.


  4. There is no stracazzo “service improvement” because the data is sold to ‘NSA.

I swear I tried to write them in a different order, but wherever I put it, the number four hypotheses continues to pounce on the eyes. Just those eyes that amazon (I’m convinced) believed to be green. All three.

And I wonder how long it will take the most spectacular mass stunned the story (which we call “journalists”) to begin to suspect that if a search engine offers Adidas when trying Puma, if you do not understand that ports 44.5 after ‘eighth pair of shoes you buy, if you promise to know when will your next menstrual cycle although you are a carrier of XY chromosomes, maybe all these service improvements are a fucking excuse that does not stand ?

Dear journalists “computer experts”, but really you have not noticed that for fifteen years are promising “targeted advertising, clipped on our tastes”, and continue to receive advertising of things that you will not give a fuck?

Not to mention the marketing “advanced.” In recent years especially I buy Acqua di Parma (Amazon, Google, can you hear me?) Because I like. The buy online because the places that sell it back to me uncomfortable. DI usually are downtown, I live in the countryside, and then wins laziness. it is true that I have different smells, but the brand I like and the life of a bottle now you should have understood. How about to offer me a -circa- perfume when I finished the old one?

But all this does not happen. Of all the intelligence that is promised for years, the Bigz Dataz with graphene quantum computing that brings me before their eyes the thing that I want to nothing is done for decades.

It is not hard: I would like to point out that this exercise can very well to any porn site . As soon as I looked at the beginning of five or six videos to see if they inspire me, the porn site offers me the kind of which I want tonight with increasing precision.

But Amazon has not understood my shoe size after 8 pairs of shoes you buy.

On the other hand, given the gangsters continue to record everything we do to “improve service.”

What do I mean?

 Service Improvement?

no one except journalists “computer experts” capable of maintaining that something happens, even when no one sees any trace.

So I ask her to the famous “debunkers” of the Internet: you have any PROOF of the existence of these “service improvements”?

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