April 25, 2024

The mountain of shit theory

Uriel Fanelli's blog in English

Kein Pfusch

Uff .. still on martial arts. (Last, then I swear I stop)

Uff .. still on martial arts. (Last, then I swear I stop)

When entering into any discourse concerning any epic male narrative, the result is always to attract those whom I call "failed males", ie a type of male who instead of simply doing the male builds a narrative of manhood on the own person. Among these failed males there are certainly fascists, and many of those who (unfortunately) are attracted to martial arts.

In the last post on MMA I said this:

Uff .. still on martial arts. (Last, then I swear I stop)

So my position had to be clear. I see from the referers that some failed males feel their virility in danger (beware! The black pea with long and lurking! LOL), and they took it.

But to tell the truth, theirs seems to me the usual fascist discourse (and it doesn't surprise me, given that fascism is a narrative of virility sold to otherwise failed males), and the fascist discourse is the following:

I set off a war, but if they all hit me then they are bad, and I cry "and the sinkholes? And Dresden? " Well, the Foibe you've been looking for invading Yugoslavia, and Dresden you've been looking for by launching the V1 and V2 on London.

In the same way, the lovers of MMA are exploiting the fuck to the whole web with videos of this type:

Now, the video is clearly false. First, members of "special forces" are not allowed to appear in the media. Never. They can't even have a Facebook account. And it's not just a Russian thing. Also in the USA. Everywhere. Italy included:

Uff .. still on martial arts. (Last, then I swear I stop)
https://rep.repubblica.it/pwa/generale/2019/11/11/news/base_comsubin_addestramento_forze_armate-240883340/

So, the one in the video is not a member of the special forces. He has some uniforms, but that means maybe he's the cook in the barracks. Or a guy dressed in camouflage and shoes.

But the problem is not the fake video. Many videos of "MMA versus martial art X" are fake: they always show "X world champions", or "masters of X", but then when you look for credentials you discover that they were champions 30 years ago, or that they never were , and that no one has ever named them "masters".

But then again, the problem is not the video of a guy who leads a Russian army cook.

The question is: what would you like to show with this video?

That a group of MMA wrestlers might go to Syria and demolish the Islamic State, as they did just over 2000 speznaz? Forget it. So what would this video want to show? That soldier is less than an orange Judo belt, or the big guy would have been caged in a Juji the first time he got on all fours. What did you want to prove by putting a Russian army cook against a semi-professional wrestler?

The reality is that the US would like to build a martial arts business. But they have a problem: when it comes to Kung fu, obviously Copyright is Chinese. You can shoot as long as you like, but if Shaolin monks appear in a show, obviously the audience and the business are better.

Judo, Aikido, Ju Jitsu are Japanese arts, and when they arrive then they eventually take the whole business. Muay Thai would be perfect, but of course Thais do more audiences. Ju Jitsu would also be good, but Brazilians have set up very strong schools. You can try the Greco-Roman wrestling, but then find Turks, Iranians, Jordanians and others who tear you up. And it is also widespread in many parts of Russia. So losing to the Russians would be really embarrassing for the US, which has few champions in almost all traditional martial arts.

Now, if I really had this perfect technique I would send my fighters to win the gold medal in all other martial arts, which however (who knows why) does not happen. And so the Americans, who in the other martial arts do not win much, have decided to invent one.

And now they have to pump it. And up to here there would be nothing wrong. I repeat: nothing wrong: do your tournaments, film them, put them online and people will like them. If it's spectacular, brutal as Americans like it, maybe you'll like it. I mean, Wrestling is also popular in Europe at the end.

But the problem is that they must not only let you know that MMA exists: they must also make you forget that they are saws in almost all other traditional martial disciplines. In Judo women, the US started winning something in … 2012.

And so today when I look for a video about Aikido to show it to my daughter, I can't find videos about Aikido. I find videos of an MMA expert or an American "self-defense" expert who spit shit on Aikido. Then you go to see what kind of body they have and how they move, and discover that they couldn't do Aikido because they are buffaloes that move like buffalo. Fox and grapes, anyone?

But here we are at the point: I don't do basketball because I don't have the height. But don't waste basketball. Similarly, I tried Aikido. I didn't like it, and maybe I don't have the right build: Judo is better for me.

But I don't spend my whole life spitting on Aikido. I tried, I arrived at the first belt, but I didn't like it. It can happen. But I don't spend my life spitting on it.

I also tried Muay Thai. There I lasted much longer, because I had a great teacher, whose name was Flavio Monti. I can discuss his political tendencies or anything, but he was good at teaching. Because it's not enough to be good as a fighter, you have to be good as a teacher. Flavio Monti was a great teacher and trainer. I don't know if he's still in business, but he was a good teacher: if you're in Bologna and you want to do it, go to him.

Now, even there I had a problem: I came from Judo. But it is not a question of "Judo is more effective". Of course I can say that grabbing a person by the neck with both hands and then raising the knee is not the most brilliant thing to do if you are facing a judoka. But those who make Muay Thai will say that the Judo guard is non-existent. So they are sterile discussions. Theoretical.

The real problem of Muai Thay, which is why after I returned to Judo, is that after a few years I realized that … I never did Muay Thai.

Let me explain: when you are fighting in the gym in judo, you are really fighting. If you shoot the ground, you put all the strength you have. All. Don't pretend. You stop if the opponent abandons, of course, but if you can make him an Ippon with all the effort possible, and make him fly hard on the ground, he can't complain. If he was injured when he fell, it's because HE fell badly.

Even in the fight on the ground, you put ALL the strength in the gym. Do ALL that you can, with all the strength you have, provided you stop if the opponent abandons. But don't limit yourself. For nothing.

Muay Thai is different. And mind you, Monti is not a young lady who forbids you from hitting hard. But how strong can you really beat a guy who has to go to work tomorrow? The truth is that they punched each other in the air at the end of each lesson. Good conditioning exercise. But they were punches … in the air.

During the training we were in pairs, and we had an opponent in front. But we couldn't really hit him. He had to stop. For me, used to doing everything, and really doing it, with all possible force, even during the exercises, it was unnerving.

I don't go on the mat with the helmet. Many times I have bandaged fingers, it's true. But I have no gloves and helmets. You go up and do everything you can, with all possible strength. Also in operation. Always. It is up to the opponent to abandon if you strangle him too strongly: but we don't stop just because his face is blue. We need abandonment. Tap, tap.

With the fighting arts, except perhaps the Boxing where they really hit "quite often", I always had the same problem. No one really practices them. Fists stop before hitting. Kicks are never too strong: it is true that in Muai Thay you can split a femur with a kick.

But you never did it in the gym. How do you know that it works with YOUR foot?

For example, I know my pulse. If during a randori on the ground I try to strangle someone, I know that I have to press on the neck at a precise point, to be able to twist my wrist and close the jugular. One centimeter up or one centimeter down, and strangulation doesn't work. Yes, the person lacks the air, but the strangulation aims to remove the blood from the brain, not the air to the lungs.

How do I know that I can really do it? It's because during the randori we really do it. And so I learned how "my" wrist works, which has different dimensions than another's: one centimeter farther or further back and it doesn't work. And that's why we really try it. It is done: and when someone does it to you, as soon as you hear that a jugular is pressing you, you give up. Because without air in your lungs you have a few tens of seconds, with a closed jugular you have much less.

But how exactly do you know that your calcium "can crack a femur"? Do you split femurs in the gym? No. How do you know what is the precise point where to hit a real person to smash a femur? Have you ever done it? No.

The truth is, you hit a lot.

The same goes for punches. Ok, it's true: the fists hurt and you can even feel with the glove. They pulled. But how many people have you really hit? Out of 100 lessons, an average practitioner gets into the ring a few hours at most. The rest is simulated. For geometric reasons (there are never enough rings and enough experienced opponents) POCO is fought. The rest is training.

Punches that don't hit, kicks that stop in time, gloves and shin guards.

And mind you: Flavio Monti was definitely not a young lady who prevented you from hitting you. Only obviously you can't come back with a black eye from every lesson just to teach your partner how to hit a real human face. Still, it's not as simple as it looks in the movies. If you want to go home without broken bones.

So in the end I felt uncomfortable: when you judo, at least half of the lesson is spent doing real things. Lots seriously. You really do the techniques (at most the first time you teach it you do it slowly, but then you really do it: how do you make an XYZ (ippon, morote, etc) Seoi Nage "for pretend"?).

This made me uneasy: all the time, and I talk about years, I will be in the ring maybe a dozen times, and always for a few minutes: there were also the others, of course. In the same period with Judo I fought for hours and hours, simply because the final half hour of roriori on the ground (or not) you do it seriously.

If you do Judo, at the end of the lessons half an hour of this is normal.

But I don't go around shedding Muay Thai.

I am not telling you that it is not "practical", because as a sport it is beautiful, it requires a very high physical preparation, very rapid reflexes, and certainly benefits you in a real battle.

But, I repeat: I don't go around losing anyone. I just didn't like it. I wanted to fight more, for me it was the ring the beautiful moment, the really beautiful one, and for obvious reasons of "geometric" availability you couldn't spend so much time there: there were also the other students who wanted to fight.

In Judo this is not a problem: everyone on the ground to fight, and even if they collide with a neighboring couple, ok: "it is" practical ". If you are in odd numbers, no problem: a heavier one makes randori with lighter ones, and you also enjoy using your legs a lot more. But there is a lot of struggle.

But I repeat: I'm not saying that Muay Thai is ugly. For nothing. He had also been very passionate about me. But that sense of unease remained: "I want to fight more, and I really want to do it ".

Yes I know. They are the assurances that shit the cock, and everything. In fact I say that "I didn't like it". He didn't give me that sense of thrill you have when you start fighting, and you know you have to go all out. But don't lose the Muay Thai.

Instead if I go on Youtube today to look for a Judo champion of my weight and see how he does something in a tournament (there is a difference with the "regular" Judo), I find A video like this:

I was interested in the last one, the Seoi Nage near the sun.

And for every video like this, I find fifty like this:

Uff .. still on martial arts. (Last, then I swear I stop)

Uff .. still on martial arts. (Last, then I swear I stop)

And if you look at who's behind, there are the usual troublemakers who always bring out the same thing. To get to the top of the pathetic:

Uff .. still on martial arts. (Last, then I swear I stop)
Cringe at its purest.

Now, honestly, if someone tells you that YOU HAVE BROKEN THE BALLS you can't complain. You are the one who goes to fuck off all traditional martial arts, claiming to do the most "practical" martial art. But most of you in the gym don't fight … almost never.

And so, if you get my "practicality test", https://keinpfusch.net/oh/ , you've looked for it. Because when MMA was born, no one from the other martial arts came to fuck you, saying he was superior, or "more practical." You, on the other hand, are fucking your cock.

So now go to your gym and do ALL the tests described here: https://keinpfusch.net/oh/

And shut up. For once. The tests are practical. Let them.

So the others train in peace.

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